Pray, Neither Doubting Nor Wavering

15 Apr

God is always teaching me something. For many years I have struggled with my prayer life. Needs continued to go unmet. Physical, emotional and marital problems still plagued me .When I first became a Christian I thought getting God to answer involved some mystery formula. If you do certain things and get it all right, then God will respond. I knew Christians who were prayer warriors and time after time God responded. Why didn’t He work that way in my life? I would get angry and accuse God of being Pat Robertson’s God and not mine. Some Christians seem to have an easy life and get everything they want. The Bible is full of God’s promises to shower His blessings on us if we would turn to Him. I was familiar with 2 Chron. 8:14-16 and Psalms 23 –


 “if My people who are called by My name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin and heal their land. “Now My eyes will be open and My ears attentive to prayer made in this place. “For now I have chosen and sanctified this house, that My name may be there forever; and My eyes and My heart will be there perpetually.


Return to Me, and I will heal you. Return, and turn to Me with your whole heart, and do not cling to your old ways, nor to your old loves. I will give to you all that you will ever need, lo, even more: your cup shall run over. (Ps.23)

So where was God in my life? He promised that His eyes and heart would be with me perpetually. Why wasn’t my cup overflowing? Why was God silent? Little did I know that these are times of testing. A time to grow spiritually. A time to see if we can trust God even when it hurts and He doesn’t seem to be hearing us. Many times I have made petitions to the Lord and nothing happened. God seemed so far away and quiet. The devil was forever whispering in my ear that God doesn’t care or that I am not worthy to be blessed. Then I began to meditate on 2 Chronicles 8 and I began to understand that I needed to humble myself first. I needed to desire God’s presence more than the outcome. Many Christians when they pray for healing, for a spouse or whatever the need may be, want God to answer quickly. When He doesn’t, we give up, feeling burned-out, disillusioned and perhaps angry. But, God cannot be bought or manipulated. There is no twisting His arm. The tragic thing that often happens is that we end up blaming God. I have reached the place now where I never blame Him for anything. When we understand who God is, that His very nature is love, we won’t ever accuse Him of unfairness or not caring.

More than anything God wants a relationship first and foremost. He wants our hearts. We are to be Christians who desire God more than we desire healing. If God gives us nothing else except eternal life, that should be all we desire and give us a heart full of gratitude. Look at the apostle Paul. Three times he prayed for his thorn in the flesh to be removed. Instead God said: “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” 

There is a journey we must take. It’s a spiritual walk with God. It’s a personal relationship. God still heals. He still cares about our heart’s desires, He still answers prayers in awesome, miraculous ways. He heals bodies, minds, marriages, financial situations, etc. But He wants us to love Him more than we love earthly things. More than we love our spouses. That we learn to be content with less money or whatever our lot may be. When we possess this type of attitude and a humble heart, always focused on the Lord and not our circumstances, then God will open heaven and pour out His blessings. Its a journey and it takes time, perhaps many years to develop this spiritual maturity. Don’t ever give up praying and yes, make your petitions known to God, neither doubting nor wavering.


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